{"id":339,"date":"2012-05-23T09:34:09","date_gmt":"2012-05-23T09:34:09","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/breathe-pod.org.uk\/blog\/?p=339"},"modified":"2021-06-09T09:34:33","modified_gmt":"2021-06-09T09:34:33","slug":"masking-tips","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/breathe-pod.org.uk\/blog\/index.php\/2012\/05\/23\/masking-tips\/","title":{"rendered":"Masking Tips"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Well, there I was on the shoreline, as I described in my last post<\/a>. In a place I didn\u2019t know, in a mild state of panic, with nowhere to stay and no way of leaving. I had a vocabulary of about twenty Croatian words. I was starting to freeze both physically and mentally.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In Maslow terms, I was back to basics \u2013 my physiological needs of warmth, shelter and food were not being met. My only option was to talk my way into someone\u2019s home. As there was only one place with a light on \u2013 the shop \u2013 I had one opportunity within my one option. Not a strong position. I also felt pretty foolish for having got myself into the position, and have never liked imposing myself on others. Could my position have been any weaker?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I wasn\u2019t confident I could pull it off. In NLP terms, this was me in \u201cFirst Position\u201d. As I thought about going into the shop, I considered how I would come across to anyone I met \u2013 \u201cSecond Position\u201d.  I thought of Acres, from Sheridan\u2019s \u2018The Rivals\u2019, when he says before the duel \u201cMy valour is certainly going, it is sneaking off! I feel it oozing out as it were, at the palms of my hands!\u201d\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Finally, I took \u201cThird Position\u201d or the \u201cMeta Position\u201d \u2013 I looked at the situation from an outsider\u2019s perspective. I then I realised what I needed to do. I needed to become someone who would always manage to succeed in such a situation \u2013 and that person was Michael Palin<\/a>! He travels the world meeting new people, has a lovely way with people and gets himself into people\u2019s homes and premises whenever he wants.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So I became Michael Palin \u2013 initially in my mental approach, and then in terms of my physical behaviours and all aspects of my rapport building. To cut a long story short, it worked like a dream! Anna, the shopkeeper \u2013 who also had rooms she let out in the summer \u2013 let me to stay and fed me for the next two days.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It is a technique I have used on several occasions since, and one that I have encouraged and enabled others to use – it can bring about strikingly beneficial results.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It obviously had more of an emotional attachment for me than Anna. I went back two years later (this time in the summer!) and stayed with her again \u2013 and even though I reminded her of my previous visit she couldn\u2019t remember me. Perhaps it happened every week? The Tourist Information Office in Dubrovnik having a competition to see how many unsuspecting tourists they could get to visit a closed Mljet! \u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Which brings me to last December, when I wrote a blog about \u201cBeing Santa\u201d. <\/a>Having got changed from being Santa, I went back to my colleagues and they were talking about how people are different when they are somebody else. It made me think more about Masquerades and being Santa \u2013 or being anyone else to be more precise (and so reminded me of Michael Palin).<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Whilst I acquired my Santa outfit for fun (\u00a32.50 in a Homebase sale!), I did by accident find an additional use for it. The office Christmas Party. I find Christmas a lovely time of the year, but office parties are not part of Christmas for me \u2013 I have never really enjoyed them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was one particular year when I really didn\u2019t want to go, so I decided to go as Santa. And it was a very interesting experience. I discovered that I was able to go to it and enjoy it more than I had done previously. On reflection, I realised that I was attending as Santa and not as Paul, and so had a different outlook. Consequently I used a whole different set of behaviours. As a result, every year from then on I went as Santa \u2013 and enjoyed them far more.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The main reason for the invention and subsequent popularity of Masquerade Balls in Fifteenth Century Venice was so that people could conceal their identity and hide who they really were. The anonymity they provided to an upper class that was governed by the strictest etiquette was irresistible. They didn\u2019t have to be themselves; they were able to be different people. Oscar Wilde once said, \u201cMan is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth\u201d.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This leads me to the questions I want to pose.  Which is the real person? Paul or Santa (or Michael Palin)?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The person when they are wearing or not wearing the mask?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When is a person closest to being their innate self?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I have thought about it many times over the years since my visit to Mljet. What are your thoughts?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Paul<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Well, there I was on the shoreline, as I described in my last post. In a place I didn\u2019t know, in a mild state of panic, with nowhere to stay and no way of leaving. I had a vocabulary of about twenty Croatian words. I was starting to freeze both physically and mentally. In Maslow terms, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[6,13,14,28,30],"tags":[317,316,122],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/breathe-pod.org.uk\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/339"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/breathe-pod.org.uk\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/breathe-pod.org.uk\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/breathe-pod.org.uk\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/breathe-pod.org.uk\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=339"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/breathe-pod.org.uk\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/339\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":340,"href":"https:\/\/breathe-pod.org.uk\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/339\/revisions\/340"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/breathe-pod.org.uk\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=339"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/breathe-pod.org.uk\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=339"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/breathe-pod.org.uk\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=339"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}